Posted by Mr. Scott on January 31, 2002, at 21:26:37
In reply to Re: Last post of it's Kind.. » Mr. Scott, posted by BarbaraCat on January 31, 2002, at 3:28:36
> Hey Scott,
> One thing is sure - you've got people on this board who care about you and don't care how much you kvetch. We may appear to be faceless cyber-beings but we're all in this together trying to bumble our way through a life that can seem pretty horrifying at times. I think we're all pretty courageous and if I ever get out of this alive, I'm going to be one hot-shit wise compassionate fearless gal. In fact, I'm all that already, I just don't always believe it.
>
> Anyhooo, having just spent a long sojourn wandering around the rooms of hell, I decided that maybe my meds were not right and were even contributing to my sickness. I've challenged my diagnosis of unipolar mixed and realized that my illness is made worse by my frenzied howling desperation and utter hatred and fear of 'IT', my depression. This frenzy and total non response to meds and getting worse on SSRI's made me suspect Bipolar II. So I've weaned myself of all SSRI's (they were making me crazed) and am now on Klonopin and lithium only. My body feels an ease and my brain a smoothness I can't even remember. I'm taking Omega-3, good vitamins, lots of magnesium, quarts of water, very minimal alcohol (used to be a problem) and, after forcing myself to move my butt, am actually looking forward to my daily walk. I'm getting better, and the crucial thing for me has been getting off SSRI's and healing my poor frazzled fried nerves. I can't presume that you're situation is like mine, but I can say with assurance that you need to attend to your anxiety first. Pony up on the Klonopin, cut out drinking, treat your body real good, take time to recuperate and heal and then resume your search. I'd also stay away from stimulants. You need some gentleness and care right now. I wish you well. - BarbaraDamn..I wrote a long response to you because I was touched and encouraged by what you said. I was at my brothers house however And his crappy AOL connection cut me off before I could post it. Basically I wanted to say thank you for being there not only on this thread but in general. NO ONE in my daily life knows That I'm someone with an illness that has no clear cause, name, or treatment. My life is all about faking it and pretending I'm okay. The support and mutual exchange I get here from you and others is really Golden.
I am cutting out the drinking of alcohol. Coffee will be more difficult for me to do right now (stimulants). Although I don't know why..It makes me feel like shit mostly. My brain could use some soothing..
Scott
poster:Mr. Scott
thread:91632
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20020131/msgs/92453.html