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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 13 of 13. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Susan47 on January 1, 2006, at 17:56:46
Hey, sweets, it's the sincerest form of honesty.
Where's yours?
Oh, I forgot. You don't express.
Nothing.
Your body expresses nothing, but poison.
Doubtless it can no longer give life either.
Mine has not only received life, it has given.
Mine can still give life.
Not only to a body, but a mind.
Giving life to a mind.
Now, what's that about?
Does your life have mind, a mind?
Do you think?
What do you think About?
Are you a self-teacher?
Unfortunately, my dear, your students are inexperienced.
Who is your teacher? Who guides you?
Do you have a Reliable source?
No doubt, this will be perceived incorrectly.
I have no doubt.
Suspicious minds are borne of society.
Society .. can be so .. unpleasant.
It doesn't have to be. It can be .. lovely, in the society of self.
Posted by Susan47 on January 1, 2006, at 17:58:59
In reply to Expression, posted by Susan47 on January 1, 2006, at 17:56:46
I'm unsociable. And I have my phobias, fears, and talents. What to do with talent perceived so late? What to do with so little? How to make much of it? Making much of little.
So much of what Man is all about.
Then once again, diminishing. Destroying what we have made, that is good. Going too far. Once again, civilization backs in upon itself, the structure to weak for all it contains.
Posted by Susan47 on January 1, 2006, at 18:22:32
In reply to Unsociable, clearly, posted by Susan47 on January 1, 2006, at 17:58:59
Whippoorwhill .. free is this called free associating? Feels good, feels like it, I like it, my god I LOVE IT give me more, I want more of your body, more of your mind, more of how you look at me the way you did, once, and never will probably ever ever again, when is the last time we see someone? Do we know? It's always so unexpected.
Unexpect me. Have you seen this movie, this "Alexandra's Project" .. it's vicious, and mean, and real unfortunately, all too real and sad and unfortunate .. why've we suffered in silence when we didn't need to? We never had to put up with that sh*t, not ever, never. As kids we had no choice but to put up with mistreatment. But not as women. Not as women.
Posted by Susan47 on January 1, 2006, at 18:38:17
In reply to Too weak, woo weak, too weak to whill ..., posted by Susan47 on January 1, 2006, at 18:22:32
Moderator, hello moderator, where are you? Not where or when you're needed, clearly ... but that's okay, it's just that the link I chose didn't come up, "Alexandra's Project" is ... let's see if it works, this time
Posted by Susan47 on January 1, 2006, at 18:40:28
In reply to Re: Too weak, woo weak, too weak to whill ..., posted by Susan47 on January 1, 2006, at 18:38:17
Yes, much better. That would be the correct one, not that anybody but me noticed, not that anyone ever noticed. I was invisible. And luscious. But I'm luscious again, only this time, far from invisible.
You bastard, you tried to make me invisible. Nah-ah. No.
I am real, and worth far more than you ever knew.
Posted by Damos on January 1, 2006, at 20:38:36
In reply to Re: Too weak, woo weak, too weak to whill ..., posted by Susan47 on January 1, 2006, at 18:40:28
I noticed you and all of your threads. And yes, I've seen that movie too and what you said about it was true. Sorry Susan I'm struggling to string 2 words together lately - no real reason, but it's bloody annoying, just wanted you to know that someone was reading. Be kind to yourself dear lady.
(((((Susan)))))
Posted by Susan47 on January 2, 2006, at 15:32:20
In reply to Re: Too weak, woo weak, too weak to whill ... » Susan47, posted by Damos on January 1, 2006, at 20:38:36
> I noticed you and all of your threads. And yes, I've seen that movie too and what you said about it was true. Sorry Susan I'm struggling to string 2 words together lately - no real reason, but it's bloody annoying, just wanted you to know that someone was reading. Be kind to yourself dear lady.
>
> (((((Susan)))))Oh sweetie, Damos you sweet adorable lovely man, and yes I LOVED your pictures, send me more you're a darling boy .. I'm so old, Damos.. so old.
Anyway, I'm sorry you're having a tough time stringing words together.. honey, free-associate with me, please, string anything together but I need your company here today...
Posted by Damos on January 2, 2006, at 16:07:37
In reply to Re: Too weak, woo weak, too weak to whill ... » Damos, posted by Susan47 on January 2, 2006, at 15:32:20
> Oh sweetie, Damos you sweet adorable lovely man, and yes I LOVED your pictures, send me more you're a darling boy
Hang on half a mo while I pick myself up off the floor. Sweet, adorable, lovely - me? One of us is seriously deluded Suze, either you're seeing stuff that isn't there or I'm not seeing stuff that is, cause I'm so so not any of those things. I'm so not much of anything. the simple truth is I'm just not fit for human company IRL, on-line, any kind. Totally lacking in empathy, sympathy, kindness, compassion, caring and understanding, no idea how to communicate with anyone on any level about anything. About the only thing I have an endless supply of is emptiness.
Don't quite know what's wrong at the moment I'm not so much struggling as just not feeling anything. Not depressed really , just kinda numb. Lost somewhere inside myself - hate it.
Posted by Susan47 on January 12, 2006, at 12:19:33
In reply to Re: Too weak, woo weak, too weak to whill ... » Susan47, posted by Damos on January 2, 2006, at 16:07:37
> > Oh sweetie, Damos you sweet adorable lovely man, and yes I LOVED your pictures, send me more you're a darling boy
>
> Hang on half a mo while I pick myself up off the floor. Sweet, adorable, lovely - me? One of us is seriously deluded Suze, either you're seeing stuff that isn't there or I'm not seeing stuff that is, cause I'm so so not any of those things. I'm so not much of anything. the simple truth is I'm just not fit for human company IRL, on-line, any kind. Totally lacking in empathy, sympathy, kindness, compassion, caring and understanding, no idea how to communicate with anyone on any level about anything. About the only thing I have an endless supply of is emptiness.
>
> Don't quite know what's wrong at the moment I'm not so much struggling as just not feeling anything. Not depressed really , just kinda numb. Lost somewhere inside myself - hate it.
>
I wish you wouldn't say I'm seeing things that aren't there, or that I'm deluded, either, Damos. Because the truth is that you've been nothing but supportive to everyone here, to the best of my knowledge in any case, so if there's something else going on then I've missed it.
But I feel the hand of dooming starting to open the claw-like fingers, it's no longer in the hands of anybody who cares, and now the world knows how messed-up Susan is. Only it's not Susan, it's me. And I'm not messed-up at all, I acted out everything that was wrong, that is NOT messed-up, it's just messed-up to have other people not know how to deal professionally, in time, after triggering something they might be sincerely sorry for but nevertheless damage was done, damage was collateral (and EVEN THAT sounds crazy, I know it does, but if you look at it from a purely unemotional perspective that's how it seems .. I can separate them out, does that make me crazy? Does it??) ... I'm in trouble, Damos. Hug me, virtually.
Posted by Damos on January 12, 2006, at 15:43:05
In reply to PLEASE Damos read me » Damos, posted by Susan47 on January 12, 2006, at 12:19:33
In virtuality, reality, for ever and a day, whatever it take Susan, whatever it takes.
((((((((((Susan)))))))))))
((((((((((Susan)))))))))))
((((((((((Susan)))))))))))
((((((((((Susan)))))))))))
((((((((((Susan)))))))))))
((((((((((Susan)))))))))))It doesn't seem crazy to me, just crazy making. You just reach out. take my hand and hold on tight. I won't let go if you don't. Talk to me as long and often as you want to. Say whatever needs to be said however you need to say it. You are a very dear friend to me. I think there's a saying that's something like; "The darkest is just before the dawn." Maybe that new dawn is nearly here for you. Maybe. I hope so. Part of me thinks that what happened only reinforced, intensified even the things you originally went there seeking help with. AARRGGHH sorry I'm struggling to say what I mean.
Just know that I've tried to follow along and I don't think you're crazy or dangerous. I think you're struggling to sort pre-him stuff from him-stuff. Your stuff from his stuff. And it's all just tumbling out. The only thing you know with absolute clarity is that a wrong was done and that there should be an apology. So everything just keeps circling around that. And the circle becomes a whirlpool and just sucks more and more stuff in and down. There is strength in the fact that you can see, can separate. There is a freedom to choose between the stimulus and the response, and the coice is based on self awareness, imagination, conscience and independant will. Use that space Susan. You have self awareness, an incredible imagination, conscience and an independant spirit and will. You can do this. I know you can. I just know it.
((((((((((Susan))))))))))
Posted by Susan47 on January 13, 2006, at 1:41:00
In reply to Re: PLEASE Damos read me » Susan47, posted by Damos on January 12, 2006, at 15:43:05
> In virtuality, reality, for ever and a day, whatever it take Susan, whatever it takes.
>
> ((((((((((Susan)))))))))))
> ((((((((((Susan)))))))))))
> ((((((((((Susan)))))))))))
> ((((((((((Susan)))))))))))
> ((((((((((Susan)))))))))))
> ((((((((((Susan)))))))))))
>
> It doesn't seem crazy to me, just crazy making. You just reach out. take my hand and hold on tight. I won't let go if you don't. Talk to me as long and often as you want to. Say whatever needs to be said however you need to say it. You are a very dear friend to me. I think there's a saying that's something like; "The darkest is just before the dawn." Maybe that new dawn is nearly here for you. Maybe. I hope so. Part of me thinks that what happened only reinforced, intensified even the things you originally went there seeking help with. AARRGGHH sorry I'm struggling to say what I mean.No, you're saying it perfectly for me. You don't even know me. I don't know you. But how do you understand so clearly? Hmh. I mean, yes but maybe you're only saying that because I think I've referred to things that way myself and you've read what I wrote. I mean, maybe yes and maybe no. I don't know, anymore, I never did, I used to think I was really really ugly and homely awful, terrible and I know that I don't think that right now, I don't think that anymore, so maybe it was all good and maybe it was all bad, the truth is in the middle, it was somewhere in between but in the end I have to make to Good, it's up to me, I made it bad and I'm the only one who can make it Good, Damos. I struggle so much with that. So much and I'm so incredibly tired of it. I'm just really ready to drown, you know.
I never understood it before, the term "drowning in sorrow" .. but it's true, it can happen. It happens like that.
>
> Just know that I've tried to follow along and I don't think you're crazy or dangerous. I think you're struggling to sort pre-him stuff from him-stuff. Your stuff from his stuff. And it's all just tumbling out. The only thing you know with absolute clarity is that a wrong was done and that there should be an apology. So everything just keeps circling around that. And the circle becomes a whirlpool and just sucks more and more stuff in and down. There is strength in the fact that you can see, can separate.Yes, but my separations and what I see cannot possibly be accurate more than a percentage of the time .. probably a small percentage .. because there's as many ways of seeing the truth as there are minds that see it .... minds lie. Mine has. Everyone's has, and does, constantly; we call it "seeing things from a different perspective." There's a danger in seeing things all black or all white. Things can be grey, things can be different shades of grey, even. And it can all be truth and lies at the same time. And I think I should just shut up, now, because I've confused myself ...
There is a freedom to choose between the stimulus and the response, and the coice is based on self awareness, imagination, conscience and independant will. Use that space Susan. You have self awareness, an incredible imagination, conscience and an independant spirit and will. You can do this. I know you can. I just know it.
>
> ((((((((((Susan))))))))))Well you just almost made me cry because you can be so kind, and so understanding, and you do, I think, understand, and thanks for this Damos, this kindness you've shown me. :) I can't believe it, we'll probably never lay eyes on each other IRL but this was lovely, this way of knowing you.
Posted by Damos on January 13, 2006, at 5:04:11
In reply to Re: PLEASE Damos read me » Damos, posted by Susan47 on January 13, 2006, at 1:41:00
> Well you just almost made me cry because you can be so kind, and so understanding, and you do, I think, understand, and thanks for this Damos, this kindness you've shown me. :) I can't believe it, we'll probably never lay eyes on each other IRL but this was lovely, this way of knowing you.
Well you did make me cry. that is without doubt the most beautiful thing anyone has ever said to me - thank you. Yes it is lovely, this way of knowing you.
Posted by Susan47 on January 13, 2006, at 12:44:58
In reply to Re: PLEASE Damos read me » Susan47, posted by Damos on January 13, 2006, at 5:04:11
This is the end of the thread.
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