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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 10 of 10. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by olivepit on July 13, 2009, at 23:20:16
I am such a ruminator, I hate it. How do you stop worrying? Anyone else have this problem? Its quite a problem for me, not as in OCD, just as in I get upset and anxious about things that have happened that I have no control over anymore and I think about them too much. I just worry worry worry and overanalyze to bits. what should I do?
Posted by Phillipa on July 14, 2009, at 12:09:16
In reply to I need to shrink my head, posted by olivepit on July 13, 2009, at 23:20:16
Olivepit we may not know each other but I am your twin. I wake up much too late after going to bed at 3am and the first thing I do is start the worrying will I die today, if I wear this outfit something bad will happen, if I do this or that something horrible, is the pup okay, oh no the other one is scatching, my Daughter is upset how come other kids haven't written back, will husband yell at me it never stops. You mean I'm not the only one? Benzos used to work. What's the anser? I've tried theraphy and therapist kept saying why are you anxious?????? Love Phillipa
Posted by Cal on July 15, 2009, at 7:22:33
In reply to Re: I need to shrink my head » olivepit, posted by Phillipa on July 14, 2009, at 12:09:16
Unfortunately just telling ourselfs to stop worrying doesn't work. I've found talking about the feelings that accompany the "brain talk" has helped tremendously and one day I realise I much more able to put an issue to bed faster, so to speak.
Posted by sassyfrancesca on July 15, 2009, at 13:49:30
In reply to Re: I need to shrink my head, posted by Cal on July 15, 2009, at 7:22:33
I made a decision to not worry about things I couldn't do anything about, and that includes just about everything in life. I grew up with a mother who was the poster-child for worry. She is almost 87 and still worrying.
What a waste of precious, valuable time and life.
I know that isn't much help!
That is what worked for me. A conscious decision to NOT worry; I am concerned occasionally, but do a lot of self-talk, etc....my own therapy, LOL
Posted by Dinah on July 16, 2009, at 10:40:28
In reply to I need to shrink my head, posted by olivepit on July 13, 2009, at 23:20:16
I've always found that fighting thoughts, trying not to have them, just makes them sink in deeper.
Is it possible to shift the unproductive ruminations into more productive ones? If you no longer have control over that situation, can you shift your worrying into planning how you'll react if what you fear happens does happen? Or how you might be able to plan for future similar situations? Or even something vaguely related? Worrying, properly channeled, can be an asset, if not a particularly pleasant one.
Also, even if you don't have OCD, you might find some of the OCD techniques helpful. "Brain Lock" and "STOP Obsessing" are the two books I found most helpful.
I often find that my worries distract me from my fears. Is it possible that in focusing on things that you can't control, you are actually trying to control fears about things too scary to even think of?
Posted by Phillipa on July 16, 2009, at 20:19:34
In reply to Re: I need to shrink my head » olivepit, posted by Dinah on July 16, 2009, at 10:40:28
There is also a new show on TV called obsession it's good. Love Phillipa
Posted by olivepit on July 16, 2009, at 23:27:36
In reply to Re: I need to shrink my head » olivepit, posted by Phillipa on July 14, 2009, at 12:09:16
> Olivepit we may not know each other but I am your twin. I wake up much too late after going to bed at 3am and the first thing I do is start the worrying will I die today, if I wear this outfit something bad will happen, if I do this or that something horrible, is the pup okay, oh no the other one is scatching, my Daughter is upset how come other kids haven't written back, will husband yell at me it never stops. You mean I'm not the only one? Benzos used to work. What's the anser? I've tried theraphy and therapist kept saying why are you anxious?????? Love Phillipa
yep, I totally understand. Benzos have never helped me unfortunately, they just make me tired. I jsut wish I could turn my head off sometimes. So today, I am ruminating about 3 spearate issues that I truely can't do anything about, they are done.. over... but they are driving me nuts! Night time is the worst for me too. It turns my head on. So frustrating.
Posted by olivepit on July 16, 2009, at 23:30:04
In reply to Re: I need to shrink my head, posted by Cal on July 15, 2009, at 7:22:33
> Unfortunately just telling ourselfs to stop worrying doesn't work. I've found talking about the feelings that accompany the "brain talk" has helped tremendously and one day I realise I much more able to put an issue to bed faster, so to speak.
Thats true.. although I seem to have centered myself around people who help me keep going in circles. Its funny actually. But I do agree, talking about it does help
Posted by olivepit on July 16, 2009, at 23:31:52
In reply to Re: I need to shrink my head, posted by sassyfrancesca on July 15, 2009, at 13:49:30
> I made a decision to not worry about things I couldn't do anything about, and that includes just about everything in life. I grew up with a mother who was the poster-child for worry. She is almost 87 and still worrying.
>
> What a waste of precious, valuable time and life.
>
> I know that isn't much help!
>
> That is what worked for me. A conscious decision to NOT worry; I am concerned occasionally, but do a lot of self-talk, etc....my own therapy, LOLI do try that.. Its not that easy, but I will tell myself that Im being ridiculous etc and it does at times help. But I find when it is a very overwhelming issue it is very hard to control. I think I might try therapy again.
Posted by olivepit on July 16, 2009, at 23:36:13
In reply to Re: I need to shrink my head » olivepit, posted by Dinah on July 16, 2009, at 10:40:28
> I've always found that fighting thoughts, trying not to have them, just makes them sink in deeper.
>yep! very true!
> Is it possible to shift the unproductive ruminations into more productive ones? If you no longer have control over that situation, can you shift your worrying into planning how you'll react if what you fear happens does happen? Or how you might be able to plan for future similar situations? Or even something vaguely related?
to be honest, probably not... well for now anyway, maybe down the road if I got some help with it. I just can't see myself being able to turn it into something more productive. But if I could I would be incredably successful! lol> Worrying, properly channeled, can be an asset, if not a particularly pleasant one.
>
> Also, even if you don't have OCD, you might find some of the OCD techniques helpful. "Brain Lock" and "STOP Obsessing" are the two books I found most helpful.Thanks, Ill check them out.
>
> I often find that my worries distract me from my fears. Is it possible that in focusing on things that you can't control, you are actually trying to control fears about things too scary to even think of?might be... Im not sure. I am fairly in tune with myself and generally know if Im doing something to avoid a fear, but you never know. I might be. Im overly intune with other people though, would love to lose some of that.
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