Posted by Susan47 on October 24, 2005, at 20:52:35
In reply to Re: Setting Son » Toph, posted by alexandra_k on October 24, 2005, at 16:29:39
> I get invitations to things... Going out for someones birthday or whatever. And people ask me what I'm up to with my life. And they seem impressed. Academia. Wow. And so now I'm socially acceptable. And you should see the look on my Fathers face when other people seem impressed with me. And then he will have a few too many and come sloshing up to me and ambling on about how proud he is of me and he thought I was going to be a nothing a nobody just in hospital all the time. Or living with crazy people who were going nowhere doing nothing in supported accomodation.
>
> And I just want to cringe and pull away from him.
> Judgemental m*therfucker.Alex,
I'm thinking, well, maybe not exactly. If my father said all this stuff to me, and I'm pretty certain my whole family knows I'm not flat-out "normal" like they-all are (OMIGOD!!!)
if he said this to me just even one more time, one more goddamn put-down you old bastard you ...
I'd feel like you too. Judgemental m*therfucker.
BUT
I'm going, okay, now.. does he really see people in this way?
Is this his fear talking, his fear and his anger at his own fallibility and the example he shed on you, too .. the shame he feels because you're his progeny, damn it, so now he's under the microscope ...
Well, some people really are like that.
They're totally flawed in that way.
They can't get past themselves no matter what.So, I started out thinking about your father with a soft heart, and now I just feel sorry for the old bastard.
poster:Susan47
thread:570793
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/write/20051022/msgs/571548.html