Posted by alexandra_k on December 18, 2004, at 19:52:25
In reply to Re: ., posted by smokeymadison on December 17, 2004, at 19:59:07
> are you thinking that going to the hospital would be like locking yourself in your room? you talk of being locked in your room as both punishment and a way to save yourself.
I don't think they would let me lock myself away. Hopefully I could sort it out so I don't do that anymore. It isn't like I am working productively in there or anything like that. I just curl up in bed and ruminate. I hate it but I can't stop it. That is what I found the hardest when I was in Australia, I just needed to shut myself away and ruminate while everyone else was sightseeing or going to the pub or being social or whatever. Thats when I realised that you can change the country but you really can't run away from yourself some things have to be dealt with properly becasue they follow you around as access baggage whether you want them to or not.
It isn't really that it is a way to save myself, it is just that I shouldn't be around people sometimes, so maybe I see it as a way of saving them.
Theres a lot going on there. i don't know...
poster:alexandra_k
thread:430998
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/write/20041210/msgs/431418.html