Posted by Jost on October 28, 2006, at 0:51:25
One other thing.
My work spiralled downward today. When I feel out of control, I become grim or desperate, and H seems to be rather sensitive to my mood. At least the days when I've been in a good mood, she's been fine, but when I haven't she seems very disturbed (which disturbs me in turn)
I don't know why, but it's hard to get the head placed correctly. I need maybe to use the photo of D, which was the original pose. while I work, to try to make sure it doesn't reorient and become disconnected.
so I had to glue a lot of paper under the paper, which was torn through, and move the head and angle it-- I think it's kind of right now.
I'm afraid of how H will react, if she realizes this. She's doing the pose in a very awkward and unnecessarily stressful way-- which also isn't right, but I hate to let her know all this work is for nothing. (Nothing evident, except my realizing yet again that I can't let important things slide-- and also I have learned some about facial structure-- not enough.) It's so hard to put that degree of effort into getting it right-- it's so extremely draining to say again and again that it's not quite there, and to try against some incomprehension to articulate what's off.
She's said endlessly how oppressive to work for M, and how much less work she imagined it would be-- which I can soon imagine being germaine to myself.The weight of how much work I've put into that approximately 8 inch square. D,M,J,and now H. Has me worn down right now.
J
poster:Jost
thread:698368
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/work/20060706/msgs/698368.html