Posted by AMD on March 11, 2006, at 9:36:49
In reply to Some thoughts.... » AMD, posted by deirdrehbrt on March 10, 2006, at 22:42:00
Dee,
Thank you so much for your post.
I feel very depressed right now. I'm not sure if it's from the cocaine or from the regret of having spent all that money -- that was a new one for me, and, basically, I'm in denial about it. Regardless, I'm just praying I am well enough by Monday to make it to work in a state that will allow me to do my job.
My thoughts are very disorganized right now. I've been sleeping for two days. I'm scared to death I'll show up at the office without a job, although that's not likely to happen.
And compounding all this is that I'd spent four months sober. Four months! Now I'm worried I really overdid it this time more than ever before and truly fried my brain after this one night.
I'm miserable.
I'm going to try to get out now and get some coffee, take a walk, but all I feel like doing is sleeping. When will this pass?
It finally hit me -- maybe it was the money -- how much this is ruining my life. It's not a little one-nighter like I like to think the night of (oh, just once a year won't hurt). It's a life-ruining nightmare. And it needs to stop now.
Please do send your numbers. I'll start adding people to my phone I can call next time I get the urge.
amd
poster:AMD
thread:618352
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/subs/20060205/msgs/618763.html