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Re: No message ***trigger***? » Angela2

Posted by SLS on December 28, 2014, at 7:01:47

In reply to No message ***trigger***?, posted by Angela2 on December 27, 2014, at 19:08:27

> I'm so dead inside. i just want the pain to go away. The only friend who asked if I was ok is someone who I've been distancing myself from and just deleted on Facebook. Depression is real. It's as real is the blood flowing through my wrists. Its as real as bitchy comments or non comments. I'm not going to kill myself. But I need someone to know the pain I'm in. I feel sick. I feel like telling everyone to f*ck off and I also need a hug. I hate men. It's true. I do. People are mean, and all I can think of is negative things that have happened to me. I'm so embarrassed.

I am so sorry. I hope that your knowing that you are not alone in suffering these things helps you to feel less embarrassed. We really don't have very much control over them. Distractions can help, though.

Despite the phenotypic challenges of my being male :-), I can still relate to your suffering. The mental pain of depression is real, and even has a name - psychalgia. I am glad to know that you are not suicidal. You might not see it for yourself, but I see someone successfully fighting a painful illness; an illness that is constantly telling you to give up. You have the right to give up, though, even if only temporarily. Your "fight" will always return. I find that my energy to fight depression waxes and wanes. You might lose your faith in modern medicine periodically, but I don't think you should ever lose your faith in yourself, despite the negative messages being hurled at you by a dysregulated brain. You are still here and fighting. That is testimonial enough for me.


- Scott


Some see things as they are and ask why.
I dream of things that never were and ask why not.

- George Bernard Shaw

 

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