Re: Very Close To Ending This H*ll! trigger

Posted by Fivefires on April 29, 2008, at 14:09:10

In reply to Re: Very Close To Ending This H*ll! **trigger**, posted by llurpsienoodle on April 28, 2008, at 8:06:59

I'm not well at all LL, all above.
I'm loosin' it. I don't know where all these strong feelings are coming from. They remit for a few hours and they're back. Am I Jonesin' Xanax or Percocet, or both, or have I suffered some damage unrealized and the great Xanax isn't even enough to hold me anymore? No; I don't expect you all to have the answers for me. I'd never expect so much. I appreciate everything everyone has to say though. Yet, I haven't been acting very nicely lately.
I'm so confused. I think I probably should see what is going on over on the medication board. I didn't think discontinuing Flexeril 10mg t.i.d. would be anything difficult, but maybe it is or was doing more than I realized.
I'm in such a state right now tho'; I can barely sit here and my fingers are jumping around, nearly out of control.
Is like a bad moon or what?
If I were to post over there, I'm not even sure where I'd start. About the Nardil? Or, about the 'agreement w/ PCP to detox off pain meds' in few months. Or, what? This that I'm feeling is a real strong nervousness, an edgy, jumpy, ill-mannered feeling. I'm not myself. I jumped all over Phillipa who was just trying to help me.
Well I have to take a crying break. Lie down. Think. What is missing here?
Could this be something as simple as ending a 13yr relationship?
Or could it be the 'isolation' I feel so very strongly where I live here, now for 3yrs!!! I hate it. I see no one. No one sees me. No one calls. No one visits. I hate being alone.
Well I'm like a ball of string all tangled up. If I can't identify my feelings, I can't express them to a doc. And if I can't identify why I'm having whatever they are; I can't work through the situation.
I'm completely dumb-founded. (Is that one word, cuz' I feel dumb, and I feel like I haven't been 'founded' for a long time!?)

Thread

Very Close To Ending This H*ll! **trigger** Fivefires 4/17/08
...
Re: I may not know you well, but I care Fivefires 4/21/08
Here for ya » Fivefires Kath 4/23/08
Re: Very Close To Ending This H*ll! **trigger** Fivefires 4/27/08
Re: Very Close To Ending This H*ll! **trigger** » Fivefires Phillipa 4/27/08
Re: Very Close To Ending This H*ll! **trigger** » Fivefires Kath 4/27/08
Re: Very Close To Ending This H*ll! **trigger** Fivefires 4/27/08
Re: Very Close To Ending This H*ll! **trigger** Fivefires 4/27/08
Re: Very Close To Ending This H*ll! **trigger** » Fivefires Phillipa 4/27/08
Re: Very Close To Ending This H*ll! **trigger** llurpsienoodle 4/28/08
Re: Very Close To Ending This H*ll! **trigger** Fivefires 4/28/08
Re: Very Close To Ending This H*ll! **trigger** » Fivefires Phillipa 4/28/08
Re: Very Close To Ending This H*ll! **trigger** » Fivefires Kath 4/28/08
Re: Very Close To Ending This H*ll! **trigger** Fivefires 4/29/08
Re: Very Close To Ending This H*ll! **trigger** » Fivefires Phillipa 4/29/08
See a light at the end of the tunnel :) Fivefires 4/30/08
Re: See a light at the end of the tunnel :) » Fivefires llurpsienoodle 4/30/08
'Light Holders' call to action! » Fivefires Kath 4/30/08
I'll hold a light for you too! seldomseen 4/30/08
It was just a reflection off a can on the ground. Fivefires 4/30/08
Re: It was just a reflection off a can on the ground. » Fivefires Phillipa 4/30/08
Re: See a light at the end of the tunnel :) Fivefires 5/1/08
Re: See a light at the end of the tunnel :) » Fivefires Kath 5/1/08
Re: 'Light Holders' call to action! Fivefires 5/2/08
Re: I'll hold a light for you too! Fivefires 5/2/08
Re: See a light at the end of the tunnel :) Fivefires 5/2/08
Re: See a light at the end of the tunnel :) » Fivefires Phillipa 5/2/08

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poster:Fivefires thread:823777
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20080428/msgs/826279.html