Posted by tofuemmy on July 8, 2006, at 13:27:14
Ever been in one? I have, quite recently. It was pale yellow, rather filthy looking. When I first got walked in, there wasn't even a bed. Just four yellow stained walls. They were marked up and carved into. One area seemed to have been pee'd upon.
There was a camera on the wall, up high in the corner. I wondered what would happen if I stood under it so they couldn't see me. The video monitors were out in the hallway. Anyone walking by could see me in that tiny hospital gown, caged.
Eventually they brought in a bed. But somewhere inside I had the thought that if I sat on it, then I'd really be a psych patient. If I stayed standing, I'd still be OK. So I stood. And paced. And leaned against the filthy wall. After a few hours, I relented and climbed into the bed, trying to keep myself covered with that slutty little gown.
How did I get here? Me? Holy cr*p. It's come to this? I couldn't stop shaking my head in amazement at my predicament.
How do we encorporate this sort of experience into our lives? How do we change the definition of who we are? Now I am someone who gets locked up. I'm struggling to process all of this.
Em
poster:tofuemmy
thread:665132
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20060628/msgs/665132.html