Posted by Racer on May 21, 2006, at 14:34:43
In reply to Can't detach from 22yr old son's stupid choices..., posted by Kath on May 21, 2006, at 11:38:39
I'm so sorry, Kath. That's got to be pretty devastating for you, and I can only imagine how it feels, since I have no children of my own. (That's my tragedy.)
I'm afraid the only thing I can think of to say is that you gotta step back and let him make these mistakes. Yeah, he's hurting himself, long term, but the only way he's going to learn that is to do it at this point. The only exceptions are if he has such a dangerous drug habit that you can get him into rehab, which would not be a great solution; or if he's ever willing to speak to you about WHY he does this, or WHAT he's feeling/thinking/planning around it.
Have you got a therapist handy? Or find yourself a parents-of-maddening-children support group? Either of those might help. Or find a really irresistable woman to introduce him to, to lure him away from the girlfriend -- a really perfect woman who PAYS HER BILLS?
I'm just sorry, Kath. I wish there was somehting i could offer to help.
poster:Racer
thread:646542
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20060521/msgs/646575.html