Posted by LegWarmers on December 29, 2005, at 17:31:17
In reply to Re: sorry about that » LegWarmers, posted by alexandra_k on December 29, 2005, at 3:03:23
> hey. i'm sorry, i haven't responded to your babblemail either.
> :-(
> i have been really very self absorbed.
> :-(
>can you get on it please ; )
> but...
> i shall come right soon.
> i'm sure...
> this too shall pass...
> and i'll be back to 'usual self'
> whatever wherever whomever that is...Im not myself either, its a hard time, really hard and even when it shouldnt be hard. Just take care of yourself and don't worry about miss manicure
> > ah, so she feels inadequate to you.
>
> i think that is it. i guess... it would explain the attacking. and putting down. etc. and i've noticed... i don't think it is just me. her sister in law too. but then her sister in law... is even worse at that...
>eww
> thats why having them both together was hard...
>
> and then dad brings me into it and its supposed to be 'one up' for their household in some respect or other...
>
> and i hate that b*llshit.Yeah its really superficial and not fun, but if you can...go with it, maybe its too uncomfortable but it might be fun to make them squirm in their shoes.
>
> > Its sad when people feel the need to put others down to build themselves up.
>
> yeah. its sad because... it just leads to bad feelings all around. whereas... if they stopped doing it everyone would feel a lot happier. it is sad that they don't realise that. i... i don't know that i can say anything... anything that wouldn't be perceived as criticism. anything that they could understand about that. i don't know what i could say... i said to her once 'that wasn't intended as criticism' when i suggested her taking a lead to put their dog on when they wanted to take it inside other peoples houses. that way... he won't run around and get into so much mischief. and (i didn't say this) she wouldn't need to interrupt the conversation every couple minutes to scream at the dog (which is insane given that they hear better than we do).
>
> but she got most upset about that. kept saying 'he was really good there for a while'. and i didn't say... that was because when he was sitting by me and i was petting him... i had my hand through his collar. they can get used to leads and feel more 'secure'. also... a light tug is better than screaming at them. and they learn what they are supposed to do (ie lie down and be quiet). just for the time it takes to have a cup of coffee... i mean we are talking 17kg's of dog here... trying to jump up on peoples laps etc... and they don't seem to appreciate that while he is cute and all other people aren't so attached to them as they are and other people aren't so happy to have him as the sole focus of attention as they are...
>you either have to stoop to thier level and play along or watch them and silently laugh at how absolutely silly they are being.
> > sounds like she is afraid of something
>
> used to be ashamed. when i was really sick. and the medication made me rather large there for a while. and... i think i am a symbol of my mother. she is afraid i'm like my mother :-( but so am i :-( i get the lectures about the family heirlooms because that is the sort of thing my mother might be inclined to do... to contest the will. i understand... i would never try and get those... they have been in her family handed down through the generations for a long time now. and her family is very much into doing their family tree etc and that kind of thing is really very important to them. they are for her kids i understand that... what i find hard is that she feels the need to go on about that... i find it insulting that she actually thinks i'd try and get them from her kids.
>
> :-(
>OMG Can you tell her that you don't care about it?
> > its like, Im biting them because Im in your company!!
>
> yeah.
>
> > > but no, one should aim for perfect nails...
>
> > It is what makes a person whole ;)
>
> :-)
> heh heh.
>
> thanks for cheering me up :-)
>anytime : )
> (I do like the look of nails on OTHER people, i just don't like the feel of them on myself)
>I have long nails at the moment and they are just such a pain sometimes *sigh* (don't tell the step mother) But I broke one today opening a car door, Ive booked an emergency manicure first thing tomorrow ; )
poster:LegWarmers
thread:592374
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20051225/msgs/593193.html