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Now listen Missy! » All Done

Posted by Karen_kay on March 23, 2004, at 18:22:30

In reply to Re: Pardon me, but....Mr Psychobabble USA again! » kid47, posted by All Done on March 23, 2004, at 17:00:05

(Oh, All Done, please forgive me)

First of all, you need to take your claws out of kid. Aren't you married anyway? And besides, you wouldn't want me phoning Beefcake and telling him about your fascination now, would you (and doesn't your husband have a hairy back? I thought I saw it last night, but I could be wrong...)? Now that this is settled... The only judge he needs to kiss up to is me, because I'm the only judge whose vote truly counts anyway. And that's no big secret.

And while I'm at it, stop propositioning kid for pictures of him in his speedo. I have a few, but if you want to see them, it's gonnna cost you, and the rates a risin. But, I suppose I could cut a break for you, since your husband has a hairy back and all. And also since you have that penchant for sequins and lime green dresses. (And if you want to make fun of my boyfriend, please do so. In fact, perhaps I'll send you a picture to give you something to really laugh about....) Now that I've crushed any thought you've had of latching onto kid, we may continue with the pageant....(It's all in good fun, NO??)

And just one more thing... Why do you have to play so nice? It only makes me look meaner.. Come on, I know you have it in you... Play mean, let me have it. After the last pageant, I know you want to, I'm waiting... Perhaps we could join forces and make fun of kid instead? Yes, I'll do that...


Kid, you really must get rid of all body hair for the competition. I know All Done and I don't like body hair. We know that Bean's as hairy as a mammoth, so he scores very low on the sex appeal scale in our book. However, if he looks similar to Bean that does add a few points... (Relax Miss Honey, Bean is our entertainment, he won't be DQed unless he attempts to remove his trousers.) So, do you need help removing all that hair or what? If so, call your local spa or I'm sure Jai would be willing to help you out. (Jai, are you going to jump in, or do I have to keep mentioning you?)

As for the speedo, be sure to pick a "flattering" color, as you don't want to look short-changed. Moving on...

Who said I like cheap wine? Just because All Done frequently drinks cooking wine from a box, doesn't mean that I partake in those activities.

As for the talent portion....Just what are you going to do? I realize that you are multitalented. Whether it be slacking off at work, writing long-winded posts, or just going on and on about your mean wife... But how could that ever hope to win you the gold? Seems you need to rethink your strategy. Perhaps you could put your charm to use and write a love sonnet, specifically for yours truly. Or instead, a large diamond would work for me, but that wouldn't settle well with the other judges. I think you could feed us all ice cream with whipped cream on top and that would go over well. Now, that's a fabulous idea. Or, even cook dinner for us! Now we're talking.

I don't see much competition here. Bean can't do much, except simple algebra problems on his calculator. Bubba could help us solve our problems, but we wouldn't fall in love with him and sometimes he gets angry (and besides, he's rather young and inexperienced), Big would be too busy fixing his hair and brushing the lint off his jacket to even participate, Burt, who even knows what's going on in his head??, and Beefcake, well, he'd be too busy sweating to the oldies backstage to come up front and give us a shot. Kid, as long as you can cook up something good, look nice in a speedo, keep All Done and Jai's claw's out of your back, and deliver me a nice sized diamond, you've got this pageant in the bag.... Unless of course Mr. Paul Simon enrolls... Then, we may have a problem....



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poster:Karen_kay thread:327022
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20040316/msgs/327499.html