Posted by jay on November 18, 2003, at 7:32:06
In reply to Re: loneliness is not a phase » jay, posted by octopusprime on November 17, 2003, at 22:14:55
> hello jay.
> congratulations on deciding to join group therapy and start talking. i simultaneously loathe and embrace the dark enclosed shell.
>
> i just wanted to explain the "how was your day" thing ... i believe the phrase was spoken in the context of true caring, not forced appearances, by somebody that legitimately cared about the answer (no matter what it was) ...
>
> i agree with you about ego boundaries. i feel that we develop the ego boundaries out of self-defense, out of lack of trust, out of shattered perceptions. when we cannot trust our own minds, who can we trust? so we build walls and isolate ourselves.
>
> while i sure would love to drop those boundaries, i still have a defensive fear of rejection. maybe i'll sign up for group therapy with you.
>
> cheers.
>Hey Octo....thanks very much. I see what you mean about the "Hello..." comment. It *is* very validating when someone simply asks how you are doing. And I see what you mean about the "putting it in a pill" part.
The ego boundaries...oyyy...the whole trust factor is a heck of a lot to ask especially for people who have had that violated, and I deeply empathise with that. It's amazing...but some days it's all just a cakewalk, and others even the slightest bit of communication is like pulling teeth. I guess that is where both meds and therapy come in. Not to complicate things more, but I guess that is why I may have never benefited from a CBT-like therapy, and more from an older existential, psychotheraputic model, in that I feel ego boundary issues are burried deep in our intellectual selves.
But...anyhow...you are more than welcome to come and join me for a group session! :-)
Best, peace and hope...
Jay
poster:jay
thread:280420
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031113/msgs/280782.html