Posted by deirdrehbrt on November 10, 2003, at 21:02:39
In reply to I'm a Multiple and I'm Losing My Life!, posted by Deafmom on November 10, 2003, at 18:54:18
Hey Deafmom,
I'm a multiple too. DID/MPD, Gender Identity Disorder, Borderline, and Bipolar 1. Like you, I guess I'm a bit of a mess. I know how hard it is. I lost my marriage, My parents and brothers refuse to accept what's going on, and consequently are absolutely no help at all.
I have two daughters who are great kids. The older one though, believes the divorce is my fault, and blames me for breaking up the family.
I want to say that everything gets better, but I'm not there yet myself. I have a very good friend who told me tonight that it will get better, and that life may be worth living. I want very much to believe her; sometimes though, that is an awful hard thing to believe.
The part that I do believe is that I am me. There's no other me to be. All of us, together, make that I. The conversations go on inside, and we are all parts, but we = me. Flip it over, and you've got me = we. I think that most of the ones that I know of inside have come to agree with that, they know they aren't alone, and that was the first part. I guess the point is that you're not losing your life at all; it's just being remembered by your alters, and when you learn to communicate with them better, you'll have access to everything that you want to remember. Do you have times when an alter tells you something you didn't yet know?
This friend of mine, She has this habbit now of knowing who to talk to inside to sort of twist my arm. She gangs up on me, using my alters to gang up on me. It's good to have someone that close, but the scary part is that I don't want to disappoint her.
Anyway, I'm glad you're here, and that there's another multiple to talk to. It's a very hard road, so I think it's good to have someone else to talk to.
I once took an ASL course, but haven't used it. I still have the books. Who knows, maybe we'll meet someday and I'll get to use it.
Dee.
poster:deirdrehbrt
thread:278341
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031031/msgs/278357.html