Posted by pullmarine on November 4, 2000, at 13:47:56
In reply to Ever feel you're trapped in hell in your head?, posted by Angela5 on November 4, 2000, at 13:16:26
It all sounds too familiar.
>
> I'm told to regulate my sleeping schedule. (I can't sleep until 5-6 am and then get up at 2 pm.) I keep trying - it goes back to where it was.It took me a long time to get myself into a routine and regulate my sleep. There were times when making myself a cup of coffee was too much of an effort (and i'm not exagerating). While it takes personal effort to get into a routine and regulate one's sleep, don't beat yourself up over it. The way I went about getting into a routine is by doing volunteer work for a cause I believed in, and I'd recommend for u to look into this.
> At least my stepfather has finally quit telling me how ugly I look at least 3 times a day (literally) since I finally completely broke down over that one.He sounds like a prick!
>
> If I were them, I'd hate to live with me, too.Chances are, you're easier to live with than you think. Even if you're not easy to live with, that's what friends and relatives are for. It is their duty to be there for you when you need them. and would u not do the same for them if the tables were turned?
I can't even manage to sweep the floor.
Don't worry about that right now. Take it slowly. try to enjoy little things: A glass of wine, a cigarette in the yard, hugging the dog, etc. Start taking walks around the block every morning to get yourself into a routine.When she leaves me notes to do chores and such, it just seems impossible.
Right now, it probably is. Try to do some of the chores anyway, specially the ones that are easier to get through.
I wish it didn't - I actually do WANT to help - but how do you explain that suddenly the floor just seems way too big, dusting seems like you might as well just give up - about the only thing.
The floor is probably too big a task right now. give yourself a break, you need it. If you had any other illness that caused pain and exhaustion, no one would expect you to clean the floor.
I can manage to do is empty the damn dishwasher.
>I also started getting my life together with the dishwasher. It was the only thing I could manage for a long time!!!
I don't mean to seem ungrateful. I'm fully aware that they don't have to let me be here, etc. It's just that my head is a nightmare in itself, right now I can't seem to stop crying, and I feel like I'm being further pounded into the ground by everything around here, although I know it's not intentional...
>You're right, it's not intentional.
> Sorry. Don't really mean to rant, it's just that there's no one to talk to but the dog, and I think he's sick of listening... I just want o be buried in a hole and never come out.Please read: everything i really needed to know i learned in kindergarten and the harry potter books. i think these books will help you get through this period.
All my love,
john
poster:pullmarine
thread:2079
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20001031/msgs/2081.html