Posted by BiPolarLen on April 4, 2007, at 14:09:25
In reply to Re: How much fighting is too much? » Wildflower, posted by LJRen on December 31, 2006, at 11:04:02
Ren I do disagree with the statement that it is yours and not his. It may be hers, but they are in this together. One effects the other. I know at times, that I wish I had listen to my other half when told me how i was acting or something was arise. Maybe it would have save the relationship.
just my 2 bits
> > I've known him a few years and we do have the same basic core beliefs, desires, and goals but he tends to be very optimistic while I am the pessimist. I do worry about how my depression will affect our future. It seems that we disagree about what's best for my condition. Those who are fortunate enough not to have depression have a very hard time understanding that you can't just snap out of it.
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> Keep in mind, the same thing can be said for the vice versa. I can only dream of seeing the world through the eyes of a nondepressed, optimistic person. I haven't a clue what that would be like. I find A LOT of communication of each view point is helpful. The more that each party can understand where the other is coming from, the better.
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> To help him understand better that one does not simply snap out of depression, have you tried explaining to him that depression is not like having a cold or the flu? You just don't wait it out until the bug has run its course and then you're all better. Unfortunately, due to chemical imbalances, it's more an altered or negatively warped state of mind that puts a spin on your view of the world to the point where a lot or most of the good is kinda blacked out. I've termed it 'depression vision' and by reminding myself of this it kinda keeps me from beating myself up all the time for being so negative. But with help of meds & an optimist, our vision can be partially restored.
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> About your condition, though. The way I see, it is just YOUR condition. Not his, or yours together. While someone can appreciate another's input, it is still that individual person's body, their mind, therefore it really is up to them to figure out/decide whats best for themselves.
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> Just my 2 bits worth.
> Ren
poster:BiPolarLen
thread:717026
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20070210/msgs/746910.html