Psycho-Babble Relationships | about interpersonal relationships | Framed
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Re: Can I do this?

Posted by Jost on October 30, 2006, at 22:51:18

In reply to Can I do this?, posted by LJRen on October 29, 2006, at 16:02:05

I'm sad to hear that your friend doesn't feel he can be there for you right now.

I'm not sure what his motivations are, or why exactly he decided to pull back-- but I can only imagine how difficult that must be.

You should feel proud of what you did. I don't think it's manipulative for you to have insisted on some closure, for the moment-- enough information about what was going on, for you to make the decision that you made.

It's decent and respectful of you to do that for him-- and shows a lot of self-respect and thought-- and yes-- I do think you can.

It's going to be really difficult especially at first. I don't know what to suggest-- really-- other than perhaps getting involved with people-- either volunteering, joining a group, taking a class-- reaching out to others in some way.

The one thing you might want to avoid is sitting at home, wishing you could talk to him.

Even if you have to go out and sit in a cafe and have a decaf coffee with a computer or a book-- or sit in the library-- or go to the gym. Try to keep busy for a while-- I know it can be very hard if you're depressed-- but maybe there's something you enjoy, a little.

Over time, I think it'll get easier. And you might meet some new friends-- or even just interesting acquaintances. Have an adventure-- who knows? (Might sound farfetched right now-- but it could happen... maybe)

Jost


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Psycho-Babble Relationships | Framed

poster:Jost thread:698782
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060920/msgs/699222.html