Posted by Estella on September 3, 2006, at 0:55:02
In reply to Re: Oh: aberrrant!..food for thought, posted by Estella on September 2, 2006, at 21:29:34
i guess that whether humans are 'remarkably' similar to other species or 'remarkably' different depends on what you are interested in. biologists typically tend to think in terms of similarities. i guess they typically tend to focus on how different species of insect and whatever are from one another and if you focus on differences in the animal kingdom than human differences can amount to 'just another unique species' types of differences. if you focus on distinctly human things like language and tools (like computers and cranes and airplanes) and economics and nations etc then people look 'remarkably' different from other forms of like. abberance is relative to our interests perhaps perhaps.
i don't know what i'm saying.
similarities... differences... everything is similar to everything else in some respect. but then everything is different from everything else in some respect. sometimes my mind boggles. you have a distinction between A and B and then you learn more and they look the same. and then you learn more and they look different. depends on what you focus on i guess.
z.
i wonder where z got to.
i don't know what i'm saying.
i need to write.
repetition compulsion. i knew there was a name for it. repetition compulsion. supposed to occur for trauma but i guess what is traumatic is relative. repetition compulsion is the idea of being 'compelled' to repeat past traumas. i guess the idea is in how you can find these repeating patterns in your life. and if you can describe the pattern at a certain level of analysis it is about repeating past traumas. the idea is that you hope that things will go differently this time.
i was reading about that on someones website. some analyst. he was saying that if you were sexually abused when you were young (for example) you might have repeated relationships with inappropriate people. might try and seduce them or whatever. and what you really want is for things to turn out differently. for the person to resist the seduction or whatever.
i don't know how that applies to me. i guess i worry. i guess i don't know how legit i take the notion to be. i guess i worry that we conform to these notions / concepts. i guess i worry that we narrate our lives in a way that confirms the framework. i don't know what i think.
i've been thinking about projection lately. about how i worry that people will leave me... and about how that seems to manifest is that i find it very hard to attach. so i have one night stands (occasionally) and i don't want to see them the next day. i guess i do to them what i'm afraid they will do to me. that i'll fall for someone and they will be indifferent or they will care and grow to be indifferent. i feel indifferent a lot of the time. maybe it is a defence. maybe. i worry that people will do... what i do to them. or something. people sometimes tell me that i push people away. i guess i do. don't get too close to me. i only fall for people who... will push me away. or people who should push me away. lets say it is repetition compulsion. does that mean that if i get involved in that kind of relationship one or the other or both of us WILL grow indifferent because the attraction is for the wrong reasons?
methinks i'm destined to be alone.
because my biggest fear is that people i care about will leave.
so... i can't seem to care...
not for anyone who isn't going to leave at any rate.what stories am i telling myself?
who the f*ck knows.
poster:Estella
thread:682052
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060621/msgs/682550.html