Posted by deirdrehbrt on March 2, 2006, at 18:51:45
In reply to Re: Breaking the skin. *Trigger*, posted by Tanzanite on March 2, 2006, at 14:41:39
You know? I don't even know where to start. I was married once. For over 14 years. We have two daughters.
I didn't know much about my mood disorder then. I was too concerned with my gender identity disorder, though I didn't have a name for it. But knowing that it was a "sin" to feel the way I felt, that I was going to "h*ll" because of it, I was certain that God would "fix" me. My spouse knew what I knew about it. I think we were both confident it would be fixed.
Anyway, 14 years passed. I was threatened with divorce if I didn't change. Honestly, I wanted to, I just couldn't.
Along with this were my mood swings with being bipolar. Depending on what arguments or threats happened on which days, I might try suicide. I have no idea how I possibly survived some of these attempts... Deity must have wanted me around.
My ex knew about some of these, but most were a secret.
I don't think that I was hiding anything, but I didn't know how to explain it. We both thought God would "work it out". No hiding, just lots of stuff that wasn't understood. Maybe it's similar to that with you.
--Dee
poster:deirdrehbrt
thread:615001
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20060220/msgs/615088.html