Posted by 64bowtie on December 2, 2004, at 23:47:02
In reply to Re: More of my soft-shoe, so as to not offend » 64bowtie, posted by Dinah on December 1, 2004, at 8:47:13
Oh » (((Dinah))) »,
I love the (((Dinah))) you let me know. It's unconditional by nature.
It's not indefatigueable. If you start acting badly toward me, my indifference may set in along with increased distance, and remain until your behaviors provide new evidence for me to evaluate. But it never turns into hate, once it has been love.
Remember, my indifference and distance is like "outta sight, outta mind". So, if I'm not sharing with you in your space and time, I can't be placing conditions on you since I'm nowhere to be seen. We are then in suspension; unconditional suspension of emotions.
Children can't get their little brains around abstractions like suspended beliefs and opinions. From what you say of the current state of your parent's parenting of you, the past may have lacked this useful lesson from them. No offense meant... You tell me if they did teach this.
Suspension of feelings, thought, and intentions, isn't rocket science either. In my practice, suspended beliefs and gratification tends to earmark a client for me as having maturity of feelings, thoughts, and intentions.I do love what I know about you.... I place no limits on that emotion...
Rod
PS: I've (volunteer) counselled "stalkers" at the Salvation Army ARC. I'm not about to start being one. You're safe!!! Stalkers are "approval-seekers", the opposite of those who only approve of others (conditional love).
poster:64bowtie
thread:417008
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20041118/msgs/423630.html