Posted by rjlockhart37 on November 1, 2014, at 1:35:49
hey im still up rigbht now, in a room, on halloween night and browsing the net on random things, this is not a fun situation with everyone else party'ing and having fun with friends.....you know one of thoughts i had today is watching groups of people in class that where in friend c;licks's tell a paticuar person they where always gonna be their back, i sat their and melted in my seat with urgest desire that i had wanted a group of people to say that to me, that's my whole problem of life, my case i don't attach to people because knowing they will get tired or something negative, leave, get irritated, i just leave it at that, and not have any friends, i do have people that are friends, but .... sometiems thinking im playing a part rather than a true friendship, which is basically....false
i've had my sad moments, and still do....but at this point never talk about it because it creates a burden on people to feel obligated to do something, and it seems to push people away, people always would tell me to stop doing this, stop thihnking this, and did it with a irritated attidute like annoyance.... no no no....if i hear another saying of someone yakking at me and telling me to go save myself, hell no, it's better to eat the apple's outer red shell that's tasty and sweet than to eat deeper to the core that's got some no so pleasant taste
so......i feel silly for writing all these self-exploration posts, i don't even talk like this in real life....i write vary diffrent on drbob than i do in real life, here im vary indepth in putting my thoughts and support, in real life,
I smile alot, have a good appearance expect for some chunkey munkey qualities, but do not have the talk i do as a write here, and then people want to talk to me, and it's just.....i want to tranfer the way i talk here to real life....woof woof.....
anyways......
end...
r
not a scholar but understand distress.....
"unheard pain, is the told through good company"
poster:rjlockhart37
thread:1073073
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20140702/msgs/1073073.html