Posted by emmanuel98 on September 26, 2010, at 18:04:14
In reply to Re: borderline personality disorder, posted by Annabelle Smith on September 26, 2010, at 12:18:04
I think, for me, they came from an intense desire to have the love and care I missed out on as a child. I don't think it's manipulative or selfish at all, except in the sense that therapy is selfish by definition -- it's about exploring yourself. But I was terrified that he would abandon me and I would lose that loving presence in my life.
My T said I had PTSD from a traumatic childhood and adolescence, with some borderline traits (fear of abandonment, volatile moods, emotional dysregulation), but I don't really fit the DSM criteria for BPD. I'm not sure anyone really fits exactly. I think I have been a difficult patient and I told him this and he said, not difficult, just complicated.
You should tell your therapist how you feel about him. I did because I couldn't keep it in. Everytime I saw him, I wanted to profess my adoration of him. He won't get mad. If he is skilled in working with transference, he will see this as normal and something to be worked through.
By the way, a really good source on therapy and therapists and transference is guidetopsychology.com, look for questions and answers about therapy.
Wishing you health and happiness.
Emmanuel98
> One more thing, Emmanuel. Do you think that these intense feelings of connection towards our therapist come from abandonment fear and fear of being alone and that they don't solely mean I am a manipulative and selfish person?
>
> Do you have any experience with the label of BPD?
poster:emmanuel98
thread:963658
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20100831/msgs/963891.html