Posted by annierose on July 29, 2009, at 17:38:53
In reply to A serious impasse, posted by littlegirllost on July 28, 2009, at 19:48:39
I don't have much else to add to the discussion except that in the impasse, there is often great work to be done --- because she did change the a rule and it has affected your feelings --- there is something "there" in your reaction emotionally that needs understanding .. if that makes sense. I'm not saying someone is right or wrong --- it's not about that at this point. Your therapist has already admitted she would have done things differently now in retrospect. But for you, something isn't resolved. You can't move on. She needs to help you figure out why ... what is keeping you in the hurt?
Often when I feel like this in therapy, at an impasses (for other reasons) as much as I hate talking and talking and talking about why I'm so angry, or explain why it's feels so big to me, overtime, and it can take a long time, I do have that light bulb moment or even a flicker moment of why my reaction is so BIG to the impasse (or for you -- the change in rules).
Do you feel like sharing what rule she changed? Was it contact in-between sessions?
A few years ago when I felt in a similar place, I did talk to another therapist about the hurt. My daughter was in therapy at that time, so it was a therapist that knew me. Anyway, I felt it was extremely helpful to get another person's perspective and she helped me put the matter to rest.
poster:annierose
thread:909059
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090706/msgs/909202.html