Posted by peddidle on July 20, 2009, at 17:02:28
In reply to Re: Therapist retired a year ago (Therapy girl) » friesandcoke, posted by TherapyGirl on July 19, 2009, at 19:47:15
> Thanks, Fries. It helps to have your perspective. It is hard to imagine not having someone to check in with, particularly if the anxiety and depression come roaring back. But I'm afraid to even think about the process of trying to find a new T. It really terrifies me.
>
> T has been good at other things this year -- I had a severe breakdown-type thing in January and she was my same old T. At the same time, anytime we talk about her retiring, she seems to have already left. And the closer we get to it, the worse that gets.
**OMG I know how that feels-- like, just talking, or even thinking, about it makes you feel like you are already miles apart, even though you are sitting in the same room. Sorry, no tips on how to make that feeling go away-- just letting you know I understand.>
> I think I'm going to try again next week, but it's hard to continually be frustrated about her responses. And yes, we've been trying to talk about it a lot. To no avail so far.**If I can give you one piece of advice-- do as I say, and not as I do-- no matter how difficult it is, try as hard as you possibly can to talk about it. As you saw a few posts above, I refused to go there with my T, and as I do with everything that causes me anxiety/fear/discomfort, I did my best to avoid talking about it, despite the fact that she gave me more than enough opportunities to do so. Now I am living with the consequences, and regretting (as usual) not talking about it. I know that it still would have been painful to leave (what I don't understand is, I lost my best friend and, of course, no one expected me to just be OK with it, so why should I just "be OK" with losing another person who was a HUGE part of my life?), but as difficult as it may have been, I think it could have only helped to have talked about it more-- or at least, it certainly couldn't have hurt.
Sorry for the ramble, but PLEASE try to talk to her about it. You can try doing what I did-- I express myself a lot better in writing, so I got into the habit of keeping a journal along with my mood trackers, and I would email the entries to her before each session. Maybe it would be easier for you to write some things down and give them to her to read. Just a thought.
poster:peddidle
thread:906663
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090706/msgs/907648.html