Posted by SLS on April 30, 2009, at 16:11:44
In reply to I Am So Sad, posted by sassyfrancesca on April 30, 2009, at 12:52:37
> I could never talk like that to anyone (even someone I didn't like),
I often feel the same way about some of the things said to me or that I witness being said to others. Sometimes, I think there is something wrong with me - that I maybe don't have the assertiveness and self-esteem that it takes to say such things. When I evaluate this for myself, I come to see that there really isn't anything wrong with me at all. I am just different from these people. I happen to like and be proud of that I am different than this type of person. I have no lack of self-esteem. I can certainly be assertive. I just can't be insensitive and abusive.
It is very easy to have an abusive angry outburst. It is much harder to apologize for it. I think some people will invest themselves into justifying their angry outbursts rather than admit to themselves that they were wrong and take the courageous step of offering an apology.
I am sorry that this communication from your friend has upset you to the point of physical illness. That is a very potent reaction, the source of which has more to do with you than the other person. I think this is an important opportunity for you to explore this more closely. I am guessing that you will find issues that need some attention.
Oh, before I forget...
:-)
- Scott
poster:SLS
thread:893583
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090421/msgs/893600.html