Posted by B2chica on December 19, 2008, at 7:51:04
In reply to Re: omg, i exploded...**Trigger**, posted by muffled on December 18, 2008, at 21:08:21
thank you muffled.
i'm glad someone responded. i'm feeling a little abandoned right now.
the hard thing for me is i'll be off work for two weeks with the holidays and such, so i wont have internet access. i'm scared to be without babble right now. i might go to the library monday but we're leavng out of town tuesday and wont be back till after xmas. so maybe this monday and the next i can sneak into the library? and talk to you guys.i really need support right now, i feel like i have none.
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last night after session when i went home i was so still 'out of it', you know kind of lingering between worlds and even DH knew i must have had a bad session, so i just curled up on our big chair and stayed there. DH went in the other room to start some laundry and my DD saw me curled up on the chair, came up to me and full handed slapped me, i couldn't even look at her i immediately 'switched' to littleone and started crying, FULL crying like she does, so i put my head down even further (burried in chair). then DD must have been upset that i was crying because she started to hit my head and wouldn't stop. i couldn't switch back to stop her...i was getting flashbacks visual and emotional.
i think that's what 'froze me'.
DD finally stopped and DH came in to see what was going on. me (as littleone) bawled to DH and told him what she did. luckily then he kind of took over, he disciplined her (timeout till she said sorry to me)part of me thinks she knew i wasnt myself, that's why she came after me.
write me off the rest of the night. i was a lump the rest of the night. i was able to get up and put her to bed, but that's about all i did.
i stayed curled up on that chair and didn't move.*******************
today i'm feeling sad, lonely, still somewhat dissociated...and just sad.
i'm just sad.
i'm sad.
i feel bad, icky inside.i hate this, its stupid.
poster:B2chica
thread:869435
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081219/msgs/869590.html