Posted by muffled on December 7, 2008, at 21:53:52
In reply to Re: Dissoc disorders, not easy, posted by rskontos on December 7, 2008, at 20:11:56
> Muffled you know what and who I am. I often rail at my t about my dx. But I do have huge stretches of lost time. I have lost days, weeks. I have awaken from a fugue stretch, amnesia if you will, and not remember people, or being in a room with people I did not remember ever coming into contact with. It is so upsetting to say the least. And why I never sought help, or wondered why this happened still baffles me. I just I just, tried to forget it happening. I have bought things and not remember buying them.
*:-( ((((RSK))), yes to me that is more DID, I suppose you could say 'true' DID or something like that.
Its the constant changing and confusion that makes it hard to get help. The inconsistancy, the noise. :-(> Sometimes it is simple things. Like we get Netflix. We get movies in the mail, that no one in the house ordered. I did not remember ordering them.
* :-( Thats goto be hard. Sometimes I have doubts, but not 'in my face' stuff like this. Kinda hard to deny when stuff like that happens :-(
> I don't want to say more because, I am feeling a little uneasy with this.*sigh, another thing. Random emotions. No knowing why we feel what we do. Not having a CLUE.
> I will say that my p-doc did give me a DID dx. I don't like it. Sometimes I feel that there is a stigma attached to this dx. Probably it is my stigma I am attaching. I do run across posts that make me think that, so I don't post. But then again, I am sometimes very, I don't the word, easily triggered. So again I just try to lurk.*It is not just you RSK. There is great misunderstandings bout DD's, that why I wanted to post about it here. Its not like you can tell people, I have a DD cuz ya, they think DID, and that you are going to be all weird or something.
Which, in my experience is not the case, moost dissociatives try and hide it. Their partners do not even know.
> I just wanted to post to say I understand. All too well.*awwww thanks (((Rsk))) I somewhat understand DID, but not fully, just I know if I find my DD confusing, well, its goto be alot harder for others who are further on this continuum.
> But I think your t is good with yours. lately I question mine. So tomorrow I am going to tell him how i feel.*maybe you could post some? My T is ok I guess.
> He sometimes treats it ok so you dissociate, it is just a way of coping. Now lets move on. Maybe that is better.*???My T is matter of fact about it, which was shocking initially, but I used to her now.
> I don't know.
>
> I am sorry so you feel so bad. I often worry I am a bad mom too.*Ya, reckon I've sweated alot bout bad Mom stuff, but I DO know I am doing much better than I was...
> I often feel so disconnected.*Thats one of my probs, I am not 'there' alot of times....
I used to go hours w/o talking to my kids when they were small. I'd allasudden realize it. I used to take them to my friends house (she LOVES to talk!) so they could have someone chatter to them.
> But mine are 20, she is ok doing well, the other is 16, he is doing well. So maybe I am doing ok afterall.*:-) I am HAPPY to hear your kids are OK :-)
> again so sorry you feel bad.*I don't feel as bad as I once did, so no worries.
> And I am sorry if I made anyone else feel bad.
>
> I don't mean to ever be uncivil or put anyone down.*I don't think you ever do Rsk. Your always kind so fars I can remember.
You take good care,
thanks,
Muffled
poster:muffled
thread:867169
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20081205/msgs/867395.html