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Re: Well, I slept on it - trigger perhaps » seldomseen

Posted by Dinah on November 21, 2008, at 16:34:56

In reply to Re: Well, I slept on it - trigger perhaps » Dinah, posted by seldomseen on November 21, 2008, at 15:53:46

> But the availability is a long term problem, as is my feeling that he is just "phoning it in".
>
> Perhaps it is because I have been with him so long, and know what he is capable of, that the absence of him in the room is that much more pronounced. This benign neglect is intolerable.
>
> And will continue to do so, if my therapist will just come back.

As you might recall, I had a similar problem recently. I posted that I couldn't go through it again. And I wouldn't.

I meant it.

My therapist was "absent" for a year. It made me frantic to reach for that space where he normally is, and find it empty. And to have him insist that he really was there when I knew he wasn't. When it looked to happen again, I knew I couldn't take going through that again.

My therapist pulled it together for me. He was able to drag himself into the room, if only to argue with me. He wasn't his best for a bit, but he was *there*.

I couldn't tolerate it if he wasn't. It makes me far too anxious.

I hope your therapist is also able to fix whatever is wrong on his side, and be fully present for you again.

 

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