Posted by lucie lu on October 1, 2008, at 20:24:27
In reply to Re: I feel sad, posted by Angela2 on October 1, 2008, at 15:18:02
> Lucie, oh my goodness, thank you so much. For someone on their lunch break, you write very well! no rambling at all. And helpful. Thank you for taking the time to write a post to me.
:)
> It's like, I want to be more social and make more friends but I avoid because I used to feel intimidated. Now I'm not really that nervous but I avoid anyway. I think it's an automatic habit. Although, with some situations I am still quite intimidated.
I think you're probably right in identifying it as a habit. Me too. It wasn't that people were not friendly to me, it was more like I developed a habit of dodging their friendly overtures. So it was a challenge to me to try to stop my evasion tactics, and to just stand still in front of someone and be open. Still working on that ;)
> One thought I am challenging right now is, how would talking tocertain people in real life be different from babble? Or be different from the people I feel comfortable around?There is one thing that is very different, and that's that this is a mental health site - everyone here is interested in discussing things that are for the most part not usual social discourse. It's very easy to lose sight of that, and assume that talking about these very personal and sensitive things is a way to be authentic. There are other, better ways to be authentic in a social context, and talking about very personal things makes most people uncomfortable. (Don't ask me how I learned this.) Unless of course you met in a support group... and even then it might be good to talk about something else for a change. So babble is a great place to explore those areas with mutually interested people. I think it is because we are anonymous that we can be so candid and open with each other here. But, what we do have in common with people you may come into contact with is: common interests and being interested in other people make friends and forge bonds.
> I'm going to print out your post too Lucie Lu. Thank you again Lucie Lu, for telling me your story and reaching out.
Looking forward to hearing about your experiences and progress with your social life - I'm sure I will learn something new from your efforts too :)
Lucie
poster:lucie lu
thread:854960
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080920/msgs/855178.html