Posted by Nadezda on September 28, 2008, at 10:51:51
In reply to Re: What's the most inane conversation you've ever had » lucie lu, posted by seldomseen on September 28, 2008, at 7:14:29
I can definitely see that the pressure of your need to talk the diagnosis and the sense of yourself that it affects about that would make your T a bit tone-deaf in insisting on talking about the interaction in the waiting room. So, I really do understand where you're coming from-- and would be frustrated, too, if my T were so off-base in going off on such a tangent from my pressing issues.
I wanted to say a few words on your T's behalf, though. I can really see why, from his point of view, that would be an important and potentially important thing to delve into. From his point of view, he had badly screwed up in leaving confidential information there where you might be tempted to look into it. I mean he must have felt terrible embarrassed, frightened of the implications, and worried that you might be mistrustful of his guarding of your privacy, as well as possibly knowing something upsetting about another patient. It really could have been quite a mess-- if you had looked at the notebook-- or even if, less disastrously, you'd wanted to and resisted the temptation, but now felt queasy about it all. So, he probably was very caught up in damage control-- because, on top of all that, he sort of accused you of violating someone's privacy -- when, in fact, he had put you in harms' way-- so he must have felt quite guilty about his first reaction and worried that he had upset you.
Now I agree that you might have been completely uninterested in the notebook-- a notebook is only as intriguing as you feel it is-- for sure. But at the same time-- I wonder if his implicit accusation, or concern, might not have bothered you. Maybe it didn't. I guess it's always hard to evaluate these things-- but I do feel rather bad for your poor T- because not only did he screw up with the notebook, he pushed you completely off-course with his over=concern with your reaction. He probably began banging his head against the wall right after you left.
I have had inane conversations with my T-- usually about some movie that's the latest thing, or about politics, or something else equally silly-- and we agree that we've somewhat played hooky. But this type of inanity seems to be a but more serious-- and I guess shows that so far, your T doesn't quite get how focussed you are on the issues around your mood and the diagnosis.
Have pity on the poor guy.
Nadezda
poster:Nadezda
thread:854263
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080920/msgs/854597.html