Posted by TherapyGirl on September 27, 2008, at 19:46:27
I have not seen my T in 6.5 weeks. I was in the countdown on the number of days until I saw her again (next Thursday). And then I got home tonight and had a card from her. I thought, "How nice. T has sent me a thank you note." Then I read it. She did thank me for my support and then said she can't come back yet. She won't be back until the middle of October. NINE WEEKS TOTAL.
I thought I was doing fine until I got that note. Now I'm pissed, anxious, sad and hysterical. I didn't realize how much, in the last week, I've been hanging by a thread just waiting for her to get back. I've been stressed out of my mind -- a fight with the ex last weekend, lots of stress at new job that I feel barely qualified for, annual meeting for new job next weekend (after, I thought, I had been able to spend an hour with T), and, oh yeah, my house is in complete disarray from the renovation work I'm having done.
She asks in the note if I can meet at our regular time in the middle of October and then says, "Leave me a voicemail, drop me a note, or, if you need to, call the house." The implication seems to me to be to call or write her to confirm the appointment time, NOT to touch base.
But I'm all coped out. Seriously.
So what do I do? Call and beg her to see me? Call and hope that a phone conversation is enough to get me through? Call and leave her a voicemail to f*ck herself for handling this via mail instead of calling me to discuss it?
I feel like I did everything right and I'm still being punished. And yet she's saying she can't come back yet, that she's not ready to interact.
I hate my life.
poster:TherapyGirl
thread:854458
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080920/msgs/854458.html