Posted by lucie lu on September 28, 2008, at 12:07:22
In reply to My T is going to be out another 2 weeks, posted by TherapyGirl on September 27, 2008, at 19:46:27
TG,
There's little that I can add to all the other great posts but I really feel for you and can empathize. The disappointment must have been really hard to take. It probably felt unfair that all your efforts "to be good" during her absence went unrewarded. Well, you have been very good! It's not your fault that you didn't get the reward you deserved and not suprising that you feel angry and upset at her and at the situation. How she handled her end, whether she has a good reason or not, doesn't take away any of those things about you and your feelings.
Having said that... There really can be something to be learned (as muffy suggested); it might eventually help your self-esteem and be a growth experience for you to see yourself as being resilient and resourceful. And when you get together again, both you and she will be proud of you - even if you remain angry or upset at her, maybe how she handled it. That's perfectly understandable and I'm sure she will make room for those feelings upon her return.
I also think maybe that even a brief phone call might help, letting her know how you feel and that even though you will last the extra weeks, it will be very hard. Maybe you can present the call as, can the two of you talk about what might make it easier for you to get through the interim? You wouldn't have to feel bad, like "the only patient who had to call," because your request would be in the service of trying to help yourself - what T would not see and appreciate this as evidence of your growth and increasing resilience and resourcefulness?
Investigating a back-up support, as Daisy suggested, might be very useful. Being able to find and utilize other people when we are neediest is a life skill, one that therapy tries to teach us. And on a practical level, having that additional support can always remain a back-up resource even after your T gets back. So practical as well.
These things, by making you feel there are things you can do, might help to counter feelings of helplessness and abandonment that you might be experiencing from her latest absence.
((((((((((((TG)))))))))))))
Lucie
poster:lucie lu
thread:854458
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080920/msgs/854606.html