Posted by fleeting flutterby on September 21, 2008, at 16:18:51
In reply to Your feelings about your partner's T, posted by Wittgensteinz on September 20, 2008, at 4:22:00
> My partner started seeing a therapist a few weeks ago. He went to see her to help deal with the loss of his father and to help him deal with me in my depression (or perhaps that's how I see it - I feel like I"m the sick half, and he's the healthy half).
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> He sees his therapist once every two weeks and will see her for a short course of therapy.
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> So my question - for those with a partner also in therapy, how do you feel about it? Do they share their therapy with you? Have you attended any of the sessions? I'm apprehensive about going along for a session. I feel like a lot of the time is spent talking about how ill and dysfunctional I am - how bad my upbringing was. My partner has shared various things about the sessions - he likes to - and it always leaves me feeling inadequate and awkward. I don't like it that he and her discuss my bad upbringing and pass judgment on it - or rather that I have to hear his insights when he gets back - I'd rather he kept it to himself :(
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> I have the feeling he sees himself as the healthy strong one of the two of us (well he is) but that brings me so much guilt and sadness. I'm glad he's getting help to deal with the loss of his father - I'm just scared his main aim is to go and vent about how difficult/sick I am :(
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> Witti----I don't know what is better-- a partner that goes and talks/complains about you or one like mine, that went and ONLY talked about his work and those relationships.....?? ..... In the meantime things were going on with me that resulted in a major depressive episode which resulted in my husband calling his T. to see me. My first visit-- as I sat there unkempt, in total deep depression... shocked Dr. T... he couldn't understand how my husband didn't say a thing to him about me--- T. had no idea that our relationship and my inner self were in such peril. Which only made me feel worse with the realization that husband seemed to feel it didn't need talking about..... :o(
maybe if he would have at least talked about us, even in a negative light, it would have felt like I existed.... you know?.....
I can see where it would feel uncomfortable having your partner and a T. talk about you when you aren't around... however-- at least he cares enough to bring you up. You ARE affecting his life-- you exist. I think maybe once you go and the T. gets to know you then maybe you won't feel as uncomfortable about it all-- maybe... hopefully... *hearts*, *hearts* to you!
flutterby-mandy
poster:fleeting flutterby
thread:853056
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080920/msgs/853267.html