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Say it again »Obsidian » Maria01

Posted by Racer on September 4, 2008, at 9:52:06

In reply to Re: and the sequel...WAR...HUH...good god y'all...., posted by Maria01 on September 4, 2008, at 0:36:55

I'm not good at self care, but there are a few things that seem to be helpful for me:

If things are so bleak and awful that I can't bear life, I read Jane Austen. Her books are so dang funny, they always help me laugh.

If I'm being very negative in my self-talk -- not like that happens, right? -- I'll remind myself that I don't have to be, and practice saying to myself the same sorts of things I'd say to a friend. (Some of those reading this may actually have heard what I'd say to a friend, so you can judge if this would be helpful or not.)

Sometimes I'll give myself permission to sit back and do nothing but sit in front of the TV, knit, play online, and generally be non-productive. I'll give myself a very strict-yet-manageable goal for the day -- "today I will get dressed," or "today I'm going to try to watch all the Star Trek episodes I've got Tivo'd, so that I can delete them," or if it's really bad, "today I'll exchange oxygen through my lungs" -- and then when I find myself starting in on the self-contempt, I'll remind myself, "I'm dressed -- met all my goals for the day..." It doesn't help as much as I'd like, but it's better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick, y'know?

Creams and lotions -- from the eating disorder, my skin is often so dry it cracks badly, and it's painful. One of the only physical sorts of self-care I practice and enjoy -- it's hard for me to allow myself to enjoy this sort of self care -- is using lotions and creams. My hands get so bad, I'll sometimes use pure lanolin, which takes forever to sink in, so I'll be rubbing and working it in for a long time. It's hard for me to allow myself to feel the emotions involved sometimes, but I do feel it as self care -- I could do so much more to care for anyone else, of course, but since it's me, it's harder.

Dunno what else I do, if anything...

And based on the references, the three of out oughta plan to go dancing...


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