Posted by muffled on March 28, 2008, at 22:43:25
In reply to Re: the hardest part...**possible Trigger**, posted by B2chica on March 28, 2008, at 14:41:13
B2 I wish yopu were closer I could lend you some funny parenting books.
You are SO UTTERLY not alone in this!!!!
In todays society we don't have the etended familys nearby or living together(good and bad...)to help guide us.
I didn't know nothing either!!! I had a sister to help TG!
I first had a boy baby, kinda weird for me, but cleaning was reasionably straightforward.
But then I had a girl?! and baby poo is goopy, and gets mooshed around....oh crap(pardon the pun!) I didn't know WHAT to do?! to clean her parts. I didn't wanto shove poo further in, but I wanted it gone, so I'd sorta get a corner of the wet wipe and kinda dab away....ugh, if was a learning curve all right!
I agree w/Daisy bout the fact that your in therapy and aware, so it's less likely you would abuse. I worry bout that sometimes. LOTSA times :-( I wondered when I was changing babies and was (naturally curious and proud too, to see their healthy bodies)but if I looked too much, or held them wrong....was it 'BAD'???
I used to put my son in the shower and check his bod on the way by, rather like I do any creature( I SO would have made a good vet)but then I sometimes would worry, was I checking or 'looking'????
I have mostly come to peace and understanding that I am not going to hurt my kids in that way. I have DD but I don't lose chunks of time, so I don't think I could have hurt them and somehow not known it :-( Though THAT passes thru my mind from time to time.
I just now beleive that I am going to have to live with my doubts and thots, its just the reality of who I am, as a result of my life events. As long as my kids are OK and safe and cared for and loved, well thats whats important. I can put up with my fears from time to time. They pass.
Now my daughter is 8 and when she is in the bath she just kinda 'flushes' her privates, cuz soap irritates them and causes itchyness. She washes her poo poo bum with soap only. See I a nutty Mom!!!
I think being a parent is the hardest job on earth.
You need to learn so many things to be a MOM.
But I don't regret it, my kids have taught me SO much about love and stuff that I never knew.
So you not unusual B2, cept maybe in that you DO care so much, that you are so vigilant. But thats not so awful.
You got embarrassing baby questions, feel free to email/bmail me. I may laugh, but it will be WITH you :-) cuz I done bout a million silly things myself!!!!
Take it easy.
M
poster:muffled
thread:820327
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080321/msgs/820431.html