Posted by raisinb on March 6, 2008, at 12:56:13
In reply to Homework Help Needed, posted by DAisym on March 5, 2008, at 19:47:56
That IS tough. It would be tough for me, too, becaus I find so often that what I think and fantasize I need isn't always necessary--or even might not be what I *really* want.
For instance, I've fantasized forever about my T holding me. But when I'm in there and she says something very gentle and kind and her voice is in the right register, I don't need her to touch me.
To make it more complicated, sometimes I'm in a session and I think--what if she actually *did* move over here and give me a hug? Yikes! I'd freak out!
I've also had the experience of feeling terrified and conflicted over calling--only to have everything disappear--even the need *to* call--when she says, "please call if you need to." So I didn't need to call--I needed to know she was there if I needed her, which is slightly different.
I think it's very difficult, if you've never been taught to think your needs are ok and to ask to get them met, to even know, realistically, what they *are.* So I'd have a pretty difficult time doing what your T asked you to do.
Kind of a ramble, but I hope it makes some sense.
poster:raisinb
thread:816442
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080226/msgs/816562.html