Posted by JoniS on November 11, 2007, at 23:53:52
In reply to The Phases of Therapy, posted by Daisym on November 11, 2007, at 23:23:11
Daisy
Your post was sweet. I am on the verge of tears. I appreciate what you shared in your post. sorry you are feeling such pain right now, even though I know it is sometimes necessary.
I dont know what stage I'm in right now. I feel liek there is a creek between me and my T and it swells, then goes down a little, then swells. It creates just enough space that we can talk, but not to easily, not too deeply. I am so disappointed. I need the closeness that I have had with him in the past. We have talked about it, and I'm sure we will some more, but so far it hasn't helped. I see him tomorrow and after that, probably not til December. I will probably get 2 appointments in December and then he is on sabbatical from January til March. I know it isn't personal, but I feel so insignificant to him.
Tomorrow I am also going to see another T. My T doesn't know, and I'm not sure I'll mention it. I might see this other one while my T is gone.
So, what stage am I in? The "wait stage"? Or maybe the "reality" stage, or maybe the "end of idealizing your T" stage. It's hard to idealize him when his specialty is Marriage & Family but takes off his wedding ring and claims he's still trying to work through it. Removing the ring symbolizes "I don't want to be married, as far as I'm concerned, this committment is over" - to my way of thinking anyway. Sorry I've "babbled" on. I know we are not all perfect, and T's are not either. But I'm sad. I want my T back!
Hope I didn't hijack your post. I didn't mean to. I'm really sad. Maybe sleep will take care of it.
Joni
poster:JoniS
thread:794498
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20071105/msgs/794503.html