Posted by pianissimo on September 28, 2007, at 20:46:19
In reply to Why am I afraid of rejection by a troll?, posted by Racer on September 28, 2007, at 12:56:00
Well, when rejection is an issue (like it is for me too) it doesn't matter who the person is, it still hurts as if they meant something to me. And then when the rejection (or perceieved rejection, whichever) is actually from someone I love, or hold in high esteem it hurts a million times more. I think it's almost that my scale of another's personal importance to me, is severely skewed.
So in the end a rejection is a rejection regardless of what you think of the person who is seems to be coming from. Kinda maddening huh? Is that anything like what it's like for you?Also, I agree with something Dory touched on. This is the daughter of a friend of yours that you lost. The daughter might seem the last tangible reminder of her for you. Maybe if the daughter rejects you it'll feel like a piece of your friend is too, or at least that you'll losing a bit of her memory? Or not.
That aside, I think you did a good job of standing up for yourself, voicing your opinion while still offering advice. I never think it's a bad thing to do what you need to say or do to protect yourself. I suppose we'd all like to be strong enough to help everyone, but not at our own expense. Especially because no one can be that superwoman, or should have to be. I would've hoped for this woman to have had the tact and insight to have known that this subject is difficult for you (to say the least).
Long windedness aside, I think you said the right thing, and try not to fret too much about how the rest of the interaction plays out. Or at least keeping talking about it if it does.Pianissimo
poster:pianissimo
thread:785738
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070916/msgs/785807.html