Posted by Dinah on August 31, 2007, at 21:03:40
In reply to Re: he called » Dinah, posted by Dory on August 31, 2007, at 20:36:27
I don't know, Dory. I don't know the specifics of your situation.
I just am hearing that he's telling you what his limits are now, that they're different than where they were before, and that he is also saying that he's committed to the relationship. And it sounds as if you believe him when he says that.
Am I understanding that correctly?
I'm just suggesting a possible way to look at what he's doing other than as something that would necessarily be a cause to mistrust him. It may or may not fit. Whether it does or not, I know that it hurts even if his motivations are good.
As to phone calls, I always consider phone calls to be a boundary issue. They don't have to be a boundary *problem*, because it depends where a therapist's boundaries are set. But any contact outside the therapy hour are a potential boundary issue. Actually, I suppose a lot of stuff within the therapy hour involves boundary issues too. In fact most everything in most relationships strike me as boundary issues. It's just more clearly stated in therapy.
But that's me, and based on my therapist's point of view no doubt. You can disregard it entirely if it's no use to you.
poster:Dinah
thread:779336
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070822/msgs/780080.html