Posted by OzLand on August 5, 2007, at 22:29:33
I am feeling really hurt and sad because two friends of mine cannot step up to the plate and provide emotional support when someone else we all know starts sending me hostile messages, etc. It hurts as this is what I thought friends did for each other--acknowledge pain, hurt and let you know that they understand how you feel. No, these two people told me that they could not comment. It isn't like I was asking them to take sides. Another so-called friend has made no comment. These are women from my women's group. And I am friends with several of them outside of the group.
My therapist has had concerns about my work situation and the fact that I have not had any emotional support from my husband. I will say, though, since I talked to him, he has done better in this regard. He thinks it is terrible about my friends and wondered if I had not thought they were friends too soon, or at least shared too much too soon. GEE but that's what csa victims do as adults she says tongue in cheek, set themselves up to be hurt and in essense to be abused.
So, I know my therapist was glad I had friends who were supportive. Wait until I show him the emails from my so called friends. I guess we need to talk about how I have a tendency at times to become "friends" with people who are not really my friends. In the end they say and do hurtful things, and when the chips are down, they turn their backs on me. This really hurts. The person who was being so critical of me is really two-faced, nasty to me in emails and then goes to the web site and says all the right things and sounds so good--fools a lot of people. In some ways I want to expose her, and then I think no; she will be her own undoing eventually. Leave it alone.
I am pretty numb now I guess. So, I am not really doing okay. I don't know what my therapist will have to say, but I already know the link to csa and I guess we go in that direction. I hope the work thing does not rear it's ugly head next week or I know I will go off the edge of the clif. I know I am fairly fragile right now and just treading water. Could easily drown if someone just blows on me. I am back on my meds, dry mouth and all. I am on 30 mg. now, was on 40 mg of Parnate. I will go up to 40 mg. next weekend.
I certainly thank everyone here for their support. And I know you will be here for me if I crash. Thank you so much.
OzLand
poster:OzLand
thread:774219
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070726/msgs/774219.html