Posted by raisinb on May 3, 2007, at 13:31:38
In reply to Re: How do you know?, posted by wishingstar on May 2, 2007, at 19:32:03
I don't have any big wisdom, either, but here's my
.02:<<The sessions feel like theyre being spent with me just explaining to her what I've figured out about myself or telling about things that have happened so that she understands it.. but that isnt of any use to me. Of course I know there has to be some of that, but we never get to a place where I'm exploring new ideas/connections or talking deeply about feelings or anything like that. I'm glad she gets it and sees how its all playing out, but I'm not going to pay to tell someone what I already know.>>
To me, it sounds like you don't trust her enough to move deeper. This is the kind of thing I do when I don't want to let the therapist in--I do all the bad emotional processing myself and just report in sessions. From what I've read of your postings, there are good reasons for your lack of trust. The question is, is she fully committed to getting you there? Is it important to her for you to trust her? Does she get that you two are in it together, instead of blaming you? (She very well might; I just can't tell, from what you posted).
<<The problem is I dont think it's necessairly the Ts fault. I think it's me. So switching wont make a difference.>>
From your post, it's hard to tell whether it's you or her (your resistance? her inability to connect with you? probably some of both, of course) but that shouldn't make you think that no other T will work for you. What I'd do is talk to her about this, and if you feel that her answers (whatever they are) are true, and based on her sense of you, and her caring about you, then trust them. Like others have said, I think it's just something you have to know, yourself, but I also think that maybe you should give her a chance to comment on these issues, and make it clear that you need real answers.
And you probably know this, but sometimes it takes a really long time to work through dynamics and issues that particular Ts bring up. Sometimes you go forever--months, even years--feeling stuck in the same spiral, not communicating, feeling alone, etc. But sometimes it works--not always, but sometimes. But only you can decide if that's why you're there or if that's even a possibility.It sounds like you need a really honest conversation about what you want, vs. what she thinks she is providing, or her goals for you, etc.
poster:raisinb
thread:754990
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070419/msgs/755524.html