Posted by madeline on February 17, 2007, at 7:13:20
In reply to why don't friends understand?, posted by sunnydays on February 16, 2007, at 20:36:41
I think people would understand our attachments to our therapists if they knew what the nature of that relationsip really was.
I developed a very deep attachment to my T and when he was gone I would just miss him horribly. I felt really bad about it actually, dependent and needy.
But then I realized that the attachment I felt to him was one that I should have felt with my parents. They may have fed me and gave me shelter, but I never got the emotional nurturing, safety or care that is our birthright as human beings.
For some people, I think getting that kind of care from our therapist is an essential part of our recovery as it helps us move towards independence.
No one would begrudge a child missing a parent during a prolonged abscence, but they think that as adults we shouldn't need that anymore.
But the fact is we do need it and it hurts when it is not there.
Times like this are a good time to develop the skills to nurture yourself.
Those skills seem to be unique to the person.
Some things that really helped me though, was to identify what it would take to make me feel safe right at that time, making myself feel as physically comfortable as I could, and just allowing myself to miss my T.Maddie
poster:madeline
thread:733403
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070215/msgs/733550.html