Posted by Karolina on January 29, 2007, at 20:52:16
I know I’ve talked about my relationship with my T before, how I’m attracted to him, he says he feels flattered by that, tells me I’m attractive too, etc…
but today I met with him and it was really weird…we met in a different office than usual and there were a lot of different chairs to choose from, it was a pretty big room, for like meetings and stuff I guess. Anyway I chose one over by the window, thinking he would sit in the chair across from it. instead he pulled up a chair like RIGHT near mine.
I couldn’t even cross one leg over the other because my shoe would almost be hitting the middle of his pants if you know what I mean ! I hesitated sitting down, and blurted out something about how I thought if I sat right there, there would be a bad glare from the window, so he got up and was like let’s just do this, and closed the blinds, then sat back down in the super-close chair…
That of course made me paranoid. But then it got worse. the entire time, he stared at me, like wouldn’t take his eyes off of me. when I would talk it almost felt like he wasn’t even listening, he would give no response, just keep looking directly into my eyes. I know I’ve talked about this kind of stuff before, but it's usually not THIS intense.
We talked about some rather heady topics too, which made everything feel even more tense, and he was actually the one that brought it all up today. But one of the things I asked was if he ever felt like I had been inappropriate in there with him/seductive but he said he felt like I had always been appropriate and hadn’t done anything.
I told him that I try to hold myself back in there with him, because I ‘don’t want to piss him off’…(like if I ever made a move on him), I always pictured him getting so infuriated with me and kicking me out if I ever tried. but he said it wouldn’t piss him off…! that he would just have to ‘step in’ and ‘come up with’ some sort of explanation to remind me of the boundaries.
Maybe I am over-reading into everything, but it was like I was unconsciously putting out some sort of warning that I think about seducing him and he says it wouldn’t make him mad?? Is that odd??
I’m so confused. So I have some questions…
How far apart do you and your T usually sit from each other?Do you ever feel like your T stares at you?
What do you think it meant when my T was staring at me like that?
poster:Karolina
thread:727912
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20070119/msgs/727912.html