Posted by ClearSkies on November 25, 2006, at 12:33:43
In reply to Re: Neutral? » Daisym, posted by annierose on November 25, 2006, at 7:30:16
> I'm starting to think that maybe what is going on has less to do with me, and more to do with her own life. Maybe something is going on there. During her long explanation about the door getting locked last Friday, she said, "I don't know how it happened, I had my hands very full that morning .. I had my laptop, my briefcase, my lunch, some books and I was probably tired." WOW - I was her first appointment and she was already tired. And then she continued with more explaining --- more than I needed to hear about the lock and the cleaning people from the building.
>I had an absolutely awful therapist over a year ago who brought all her own dirty laundry to our appointments. Fully half of our sessions were spent with her telling ME why she was distracted, and less helpful. On several occasions I myself cut our sessions short because she was in more distress than I.
It's an extreme example of overshare; but more than that, it was her inability to put her own Stuff aside that led me to conclude that she wasn't the right for me. (OK, I think she's not the right T for anyone, I won't lie!)
Our T's have their own issues, and if they are well trained and working under optimum conditions, they can divorce themselves from their problems while they are helping us with ours. I do believe that there are times perhaps, when they are not able, for good reason, to keep their Stuff out of Our Sessions.
Maybe this is what is happening with your relationship with your T now. Maybe she identifies closely with what you are struggling with at the moment and is trying to make herself as objective as possible (that's my preferred substitute for "neutral").I admit that I cut my current (and great!) therapist some slack. I see our relationship as professional, but she also brings her personalilty, opinions, and experiences to each of our sessions. I can "read" her almost as well as she does me. It's part of what makes our relationship work, IMO.
Just my thoughts, I'm very good at projecting :-)
poster:ClearSkies
thread:706936
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061123/msgs/707071.html