Posted by bent on November 7, 2006, at 7:21:43
In reply to The Little Girl Inside - long, posted by Daisym on November 4, 2006, at 15:47:56
Daisy-
So many of your posts are helpful to me. This one included. I feel like sometimes you and I battle with similar things, only you are a little ahead of me, but it shows me that its ok to move forward, to be more honest with myself, about myself. Even when it can be dark and painful.I know there is a girl/girls inside of me. I don’t like them. I am trying to learn. I like being able to say things happened to ‘them’, not me. They are so needy and I worry they will wear out my T and make her frustrated with me. I don’t talk to her about my younger parts. In fact it has only been in the last several months that I even mentioned them at all, after having several dreams where a maybe 8 year old me was talking to the adult me. That was freaky. I just wanted her to go away.
I think a younger part of me is feeling hurt or rejected by my T right now. I finally got up the nerve to tell her how badly I have wanted to just ask her if she cared about me. It was so hard and I stumbled over my words but she never answered me. She just seemed to over-analyze it. She said she could sit there and tell me that she cares for me but she’s concerned about why I have to ask now. Why after 4 years? I just needed a simple answer. Some reassurance. I didn’t know that was wrong. I am certain the younger parts of me are more concerned about her caring than the adult me. And my T is always encouraging me to be more open to the younger parts and to give them a chance. But then when she reacts like this to my question it just scares me.
I didn’t mean to get away from your post and talk about myself. I know this is hard. I think you are very brave. I know sometimes sharing this stuff is hard but I wanted you to know you are helping others too.
poster:bent
thread:700352
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061026/msgs/701172.html