Posted by Dinah on November 7, 2006, at 0:42:18
In reply to Re: I hint but... » Dinah, posted by muffled on November 7, 2006, at 0:29:36
(I do hope that expression doesn't have an unsavory past.)
The time he mentioned boredom, I probably was afraid that he had seen me and summed me up and battled boredom from then on out, but the other two times were different.
The other two times were that I *wasn't* joking when I said that I'd have to try harder if I weren't his most difficult client.
Because that client was taking something that was rightfully mine. I don't ask for much from him outside the therapy hour. But that therapy hour is mine. Both because I paid for it, and because it's *mine*, to me. And that other client clearly still had part of him with her (or him). He hadn't put that client aside, and had instead brought that client with him into *my* therapy hour.
That's not fair.
And because that client had something that isn't mine by right, but that I wish I had anyway. That client was getting a real response from my therapist. A gut level visceral response. Not a positive one, but a real one nonetheless. And I'm jealous.
So that difficult client has one thing I wish I had, and another that rightfully belongs to me. Why wouldn't I want to try harder? To be difficult if difficult is what it takes?
It's no fair. It's no fair. It's no fair.
Why does my little brother get all the attention for being bad, while I'm just expected to be good, so that no one even notices when I am?
Oops.
poster:Dinah
thread:701055
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061026/msgs/701132.html