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Update on my new T (long) **SInj. trig mild**

Posted by Lindenblüte on September 27, 2006, at 16:04:13

In reply to Re: Good luck! » Lindenblüte, posted by Phillipa on September 27, 2006, at 15:27:02

Hi All,
Well, she is very nice, and I like her office. I feel comfortable there. kind of cozy.

My former T gave her an update on me, so she was kind of ready to jump right in and get started. I told her stuff, but I wasn't quite ready to feel them with her yet. I told her that I had turned off my feelings sometime over the weekend, because I was scared of hurting myself. I told her about my cutting habit (which I never told my Mr. T). Haven't mentioned the cuticle cutting though. I didn't want to completely freak her out. anyhoo... I guess I'm back to the same old games. pretend like all is fine and dandy. smile and grin and bear it...

She asked all the right questions. I think she's going to be good for me. And she's more available than my ex-T, so that will be good. Although I've gotten pretty good at managing crises on my own with a week or three in between appts, I had often wished that I had a little more support, or at least perceived a little more support, even if I never intended on picking up the phone to call.

So. Now I see T a couple times a week. yikes! that could be kind of hard on my checkbook. I guess I'll be getting a lump of coal in my stocking this X-mas. oh well...

I kind of avoided the very scariest stuff, and I only cried a bit. I think that I will probably be able to open up to her though.

So. That's that.

And how am i feeling? Well, kind of numb. A little triggered/freaked out for a few minutes after the appt. I've done well at preserving my sanity over the last 5 days with no T. It's going to take me a bit of time before I'm ready to get to that place again.


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poster:Lindenblüte thread:689465
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060926/msgs/689639.html