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Re: Any CBT or DBT or other advice?

Posted by pegasus on June 18, 2006, at 13:49:23

In reply to Any CBT or DBT or other advice?, posted by Dinah on June 18, 2006, at 12:49:42

Hmm. Well I always use the technique of moving to a new city (or having them move to a new city) to get over a breakup. But that one seems to have been ruled out for you. And besides, it's not a very healthy way to deal with it.

Um . . . they tell me that seeing a therapist is a good idea.

OK, sorry, I'm really not helping.

OK, here's one that *is* healthy and *did* work for me once: come up with a goodbye ritual. Like, sending something sailing away down a river, or writing something down and then saying it then burning it. Or, what I did was make a clay figure of someone I needed to say goodbye to, and I painted a perfect little box for the figure. Then I thought of the absolute perfect place to leave it. For me it was a shinto shrine I'd been to up in the mountains once. I left the little figure, and talked to the spirits of the shrine, asking them to take care of my person and me because we couldn't take care of each other. And then I cried and cried, but I did feel better after that. I think the key was that the whole thing took some preparation and planning, which was basically a lot of my grieving process.

Dinah, I wish you lots of luck in however the next few weeks and months go for you.

peg

 

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