Posted by kerria on June 17, 2006, at 0:20:36
In reply to Re: dissassociation child abuse trigger, I am confused » kerria, posted by happyflower on June 14, 2006, at 14:32:51
Hi Happyflower,
Yes, it was so upsetting to find out that i had DID when the teacher told me. i was having flashbacks and was so upset anyways though. It made sense of my life- explaining a lot of things
One of the hardest things was not having anyone to help me with it. i had no T that was understanding and the counselors at school treated me so mean- they kept telling me to go to the mental health community centers - but they didn't accept anyone unless on welfare. i literally had no where to turn.You have a T that knows you and can help. Is your relationship with him ok? That would help.
Remember that nothing really changed- if you have DID and separate parts you have for a long time and managed so far. At least you can start working on the problem.
It is a crisis to find out you have DID though. i remember being very upset for weeks. Everything was so chopped up- my days were so strange and painful. i had a lot of flashbacks so i couldn't think that i had a good childhood anymore like i did before. Weird things happened all the time like i found myself places - waking up in my car and being outside at school late after class looking and crying up at the sky and being so mad at God for making me like this. i didn't tell anyone- things were violent at home so i didn't tell my h either so i had no one to talk to. After a while i got a T who specialized in DID and it was a little better.
Your T can probably help you with dealing with it. Having support and feeling rejected at the time you hear the news is overwhelming. Make use of your T, ask for help.
The thing that's still so scary for me is that i have separate parts. i never realize that i'm separated- even now. i try to live one part at a time and each one doesn't think about others. There are so many problems because of it with different priorities and inconsistancy, not keeping schedules. It's so scary to see part's writing and i can't journal- it feels like a confusing mess.
If you do have DID you need someone you can trust to help get it under control (if there's such a thing). A lot of people have not so hard a time with it if they have a good T and supportive h and family.
Take care,
kerria
poster:kerria
thread:656012
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060615/msgs/657883.html